We have a winner. Agree with it or not, this entry captures the historical moment, I think. Whatever the Secretary of State says, I think this is what Israel will hear.

We like you, we really do. We're just not into you so much anymore. I mean, you have a warm place in our hearts, but let's face it, so does Canada. Those of us who were around when you were born have mostly died off; the rest of us really don't know what the big attraction is.

Oh, it's not anything you've done lately that's alienated us. You and the Palestinians have been antagonizing each other for as long as anyone can remember. Neither of you can get past your various historical grievances with each other. And no matter how much we try to help you patch things up, something always goes awry and we're right back to where we started. Meanwhile, our other friends (yes, we have other friends) continue to get annoyed, anxious, indignant -- take your pick -- just because we're getting involved in your conflicts in the first place.

Don't get me wrong, it's not all your fault. We've created enough of our own bad blood with some of your neighbors. But, it's weird, your intransigence seems to reflect on us. Yes, the Palestinians are crazy and inept but their insanity and incompetence don't reflect on any of their friends. It's not fair, but there it is.

Listen, I know this may be difficult to hear, but I think we should see other countries for a while. Hey, consider how much freer you will be. Want to build settlements in East Jerusalem? Go for it! Invade Gaza? Be our guest! Evict Palestinians from the West Bank? Knock yourselves out!

We'll stay on the sidelines -- no -- in the bleachers, and sit quietly. Occasionally we'll tsk tsk about the continuing violence and wish that the affected parties can someday get along. Oh, and the three billion we give you every year? Uh, we could really use that right now. We hope you understand.

Also understand, we're still your friend, OK? We're just not going steady anymore.

"JP1954," send me an e-mail (click on the "e mail" box above my little ‘Meet the Press' photo on the right) and tell me whether you want a signed copy of one of my books, or Clay Blair's Forgotten War. And tell me where to send it.

Mario Tama/Getty Images

 
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JPWREL

3:25 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Great choice!

Great choice!

 

IRONCAPT

3:53 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Awesome

"Basically, we're not that into you..."

 

SMCI60652

4:07 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Pretty much said it the best it could be said...

"Yes, the Palestinians are crazy and inept but their insanity and incompetence don't reflect on any of their friends. It's not fair, but there it is."

You made the right choice Tom.

Kudos to the author for their candor, which is better than you can expect from most of us [myself included].

 

BLUE13326

4:33 PM ET

March 19, 2010

I like it! Good choice.

I like it! Good choice.

 

ZATHRAS

5:46 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Stand Up for the Middle East

If the Secretary of State is ever called upon to stand in for Jay Leno and do his monologue, this might capture the historical moment.

If the Sec. Clinton says, or the Israelis hear, anything that sounds like a threat to cut American aid to Israel, I'll be surprised.

 

JSINAIKO

7:37 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Outstanding...

Especially the part about the $3 billion. I mean, you gotta go Dutch some of the time!

 

APARICIO

7:48 PM ET

March 19, 2010

Great piece!!!

Complete.

 

BILL KELLER

7:57 PM ET

March 19, 2010

....wasted my precious time...

don't think twice, it's alright...

 

JACOB BLUES

10:22 PM ET

March 19, 2010

We should see other countries?!?

Right, that will last about as long as the next Israeli trade delegation to China or Russia.

Of course, given that there seems to be much stronger support for Israel among US citizens than in the White House, watch how such a stand plays out in the elections.

David Patraus may believe that its the future housing plans that make life so rough for US troops in the field, seems to forget that its the fact THAT THE US TROOPS ARE IN THE FIELDS, namely the fields of Arab and Muslim states, that place them at risk in the first place.

 

WALKING WOUNDED

10:23 PM ET

March 19, 2010

The opposite of love is just not caring

But after 60 years, we're not just going steady. We're contemplating saving family relations, relations always troubled by the stunted twin, by conceiving another war child?! What's the odds that a joint war to stop another regional power from going nuclear, at a first-ever cost of radiological collatoral, will make us all happy at family holiday get-togethers?

AIPAC wants to send money for Israeli jets and weapons. Doing that thru the IRS, while recycling our aid into election lobbying here is not acceptable. "They're all crazy over there" handwave favors status quo in occupation policy, and the US aid policy that supports it.

 

CHARLIEFORD

2:43 AM ET

March 20, 2010

That's awfully good!

Some of the comments are a little goofy.

 

THIRDWATCH

8:10 AM ET

March 20, 2010

It's all fun, until someone loses an eye...

What if they go all fatal attraction on us and release the suitcases and suitcases of material that Pollard gave to them (few people realize the true scale of that security breach)?

Worse, what if they go all fatal attraction and ... well, you saw what happened in Dubai.

 

DAV305Z

5:09 AM ET

March 21, 2010

About those other friends...

We always hear about America's "other interests" in the Middle East, and how our "Arab allies" have a hard time supporting us given our despicable devotion to Israel.

Can someone please elaborate what, precisely, Arab nations are doing for us that gives them so much leverage? Are we supposed to grovel before Saudi Arabia's feet because they "let" us station troops in their country and supported our invasion of Iraq – a major strategic and economic rival? Are we afraid that our support for Israel doesn't measure up to the glorious moral standards of these states, each and every one of whom suppress their own people?

And lastly, what does everyone think these "friends" will do if we politely listen but do not act on their demands for "justice" in Palestine (justice they don't seem to worry about when it comes to dealing with Palestinians in their own borders)? Are they going to refuse to let us shield them from Iran and refuse to accept our weapons?

Let's be honest. The only leverage Arab nations have is not strategic and certainly isn't moral. It's oil. They have it, we need it. How is that better than Israel's evil lobbyists, who at least have the courtesy to work through our democratic system rather than resorting to naked extortion?

 

DAV305Z

3:58 PM ET

March 21, 2010

Then you only prove my point

I agree. Oil extortion is less than it used to be, though it's clearly not totally gone – you might recall President Bush groveling before the Saudi Prince in effort to get more production out of them. But I do agree that Arab nations have learned their oil only has so much influence over us, so again, I'll ask: What majestic prize is in store from our Arab allies if we get tough on Israel?

As for this notion that our soldiers will suddenly find their safety significantly improved by a change in U.S. policy toward Israel, won't there still be the small matter of our occupying two major Muslim nations? Are Taliban insurgents going to drop their IEDs because Israel isn't building any more apartment complexes over the green line? Actually, I'd argue that your notion that Israel is a prime driver of Arab policy and resentment is outdated: Most Arab states these days seem to make angry noises about Israel from time to time, but are more threatened by Iran.

Look, I'm not going to sit here and tell you U.S. support for Israel hasn't inflamed the region. Obviously it does. I'm also not going to pretend we don't have the right to make demands of Israel considering our financial support. Obviously, we do. But both the supposed evilness of Israeli policy and its connection to our soldiers has been grossly overstated as of late. Jettisoning our relationship with them to satisfy the demands of fair weather friends will only further weaken us.

 

WALKTHEWALK

1:50 PM ET

March 21, 2010

Winning engry revisited an old gag

The winning entry was well done. But at the risk of appearing like sour grapes, I first saw the winning entry in the form of letter from the American voter to the Republicans, sent around during the last year of W's tenure.
As a political joke-making-the-rounds, it had no claim on originality and may well have had other precursors.
And politicians do recycle jokes, so of course Hillary and her speechwriters hypothetically could have pulled this old chestnut out and given it a new gloss, even if there's a bit of Milli Vanilli to that..
Well executed, yes. Original: no.

 

WALKING WOUNDED

3:44 PM ET

March 21, 2010

No fair, professional entry...?

Good catch WTW. I was thinking it was the polished work of a wordsmith, but what's more professional than reselling successful old plot lines?

I used to get a fair bit of right-fright spammed to me that was repurposed urban myths and rhetorical devices, plucking the same strings to achieve the same effect against the similar targets. Plow, plant, fertilize and harvest.

Our culture places high value on style and packaging, forgives poor logic and empty calories. But since AIPAC is the reflective screen for this thought experiment, a re-run of effective viral spam seems appropriate. The politics of AIPAC are a triumph of image repetition over a record of serial abuse.

 

DAVE DOYLE

12:30 AM ET

March 22, 2010

Clay Blair - The Forgotten War

Great book - fantastic offering for a prize. "The Gamble" is not too shabby either.

Hope all is well Mr. Ricks.

 

JJH722

2:24 PM ET

March 22, 2010

looking at her comments, it

looking at her comments, it looks like hilldog took a much more conciliatory approach

 

RHODESCOLOSSUS

3:34 PM ET

March 22, 2010

What she actually said.

http://www.c-spanvideo.org/program/292643-1

 

SMCI60652

3:39 PM ET

March 22, 2010

transcript

or if you want to read it:

http://www.aipac.org/PC2010/webPlayer/mon_clinton10.asp

 

SMCI60652

4:34 PM ET

March 22, 2010

Things that jump out rigth away...

Yesterday during the "Challenging Times Round Table" Dan Senor had this exchange with Robert Kagan:

Dan Senor: Bob Kagan, what — what can the U.S. really do here to — to combat this campaign of deligitimization of Israel that we are seeing in so many corners of the world, both in Geneva as we saw with the — with the human rights, commission of the Goldstone Report, but also elsewhere around the world?

Dr. Robert Kagan: Well, it can start by not creating a bilateral crisis over a faux, you know, settlement dispute. (Applause.) Nothing — I mean, nothing does more to encourage the — that kind of view, especially in Europe where — where I — where I had the good fortune to live for six years and — and heard a lot about it. I think the United States — you know, you're not going to change public opinion substantially in — in Europe and — and even less in — in other parts of the world. The structure of their societies, the structure of their politics, is one that makes anti-Israel sentiment just a throw away. It's the easiest political card to play in many, many countries around the world and I — the senator looks like he's dying to jump in here.

This morning, Sec. Clinton came back and inverted the argument, putting the onus of Israel:

New construction in East Jerusalem or the West Bank undermines mutual trust and endangers the proximity talks that are the first step toward the full negotiations that both sides want and need. It exposes daylight between Israel and the United States that others in the region could hope to exploit. And it undermines America's unique ability to play a role — an essential role, I might add — in the peace process. Our credibility in this process depends in part on our willingness to praise both sides when they are courageous, and when we don't agree, to say so, and say so unequivocally.

 

Thomas E. Ricks covered the U.S. military for the Washington Post from 2000 through 2008.

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